Wednesday, August 09, 2006

These Condoms Won't Penetrate the Market

SAN CLEMENTE (Rueters) - Cultural watchdogs have banned a line of condoms whose name in Thai translates to "Good Penetration," saying the suggestive label could draw youngsters into having sex earlier, newspapers reported Tuesday.

The condoms are actually named "Tubesteak/Malibu" after the popular surfer/author/actor/dietary supplement advisor/t-shirt salesman, but Culture officials said this was inappropriate and offended good norms and Thai culture, the Daily Sun said.

"Although the name is not vulgar or rude, it is ambiguous, boastful and provocative," said Sydney Carton, Esq., spokesman for the Cultural Watch Center.

"It could entice excessive consumption and lure children and youths with little maturity to start having sexual activities before their appropriate age," he added.

Tubesteak, whose Thai name is Puntva Poomiprates, defended lending his stage name to the condom brand.

"You can't stop human desire, no matter how old they are, so it is better to protect them," Puntva told Reuters, adding that he had been telling his audiences about the risks of AIDS and unwanted pregnancy for years.

In San Clemente, condom producers have to seek approval from both the Health and Culture ministries.


Sydney Carton, Esq. said...

It's okay if Tubesteak/Malibu is boastful and provocative about his T shirts, within certain limits, those limits being XS to XXXXL.

But condoms? That is where
the rubber hits the primitive dirt road,
the cherry seed spitting line in the sand must be drawn,
the alcoholics are thrown out with the shark-infested bath water,
the baby strollers run over the chicken crossing the toll road,
the only balls anyone has are bocce,
the defibrillator is used to jump start stalled cars
. . . and don't even get him started on dogs and illegal aliens.

"Cry Havoc and let slip the cultural watchdogs of war" ~ attributed to Tubesteak/Malibu, as reported in the minutes of the San Clemente City Counsel, August 1, 2006

Ed McMahon jr. said...


net geek said...

Tube, you *ARE* Sydney.
They suckered into revealing it.

Moon Phase