Troubled times for Mayor Murphy

It seems Mayor Murphy has a little more than just speeding tickets to worry about.

A recent photo, provided by a local who wishes to remain anonymous, shows what sheriff deputies discovered in the passenger seat of the Mayors car when he was pulled over.

The same anonymous source said the Mayor kept muttering, I'm going to put a stop to the speeders at San Onofre once and for all.

Answer

Answer: None, it should already be open by the time she brings it to you!

Question

Question: How many men does it take to open a beer?

No Comment.

A young woman had been taking golf lessons. She had just started playing her first round of golf when she suffered a bee sting. Her pain was so intense that she decided to return to the club house for help and to complain. Murphy saw her come into the clubhouse and asked, "Why are you back in so early? What's wrong?" "I was stung by a bee", she said. "Where", he asked. "Between the first and second hole", she replied. He nodded knowingly and said, "Then your stance is too wide..."

They're everywhere

Here is a page from the latest book I'm reading. The only problem is I don't understand any of it. Since most of the readers to this blog are highly educated, perhaps you can help translate?

Video from The blog monitor's camera?

This was sent to me. I don't know anything other than it looks like SanO and the guy who sent it in claims that he hacked into one of the The blog monitor's cameras to get it. You'll need your sound on.

I've watched it several times. It's like the famous Zapruder film. But, who fired the "shot?" The second guy from the left moves away from the first guy on the left, who seems to be the one laughing the most, all making #1 look like the culprit. On the other hand, the second guy from the left seems to do some sort of "ass shift" right in synch with the sound, and maybe he moves to get out of the fouled area. The third guy shifts his stance just after, and it is then that #2 moves away from the backside of #3, making #3 a suspect. The fourth guy from the left seems to look over at #3 and then down at #3's waist area, like #3 is the culprit. Who knows, maybe it was #4.

Stress relief

Stressed-out patrons can now unleash pent-up anger at a bar that lets customers attack staff, smash glasses and generally make a ruckus, the San Clemente Sun Post reported Monday.

Goodies Tavern, a local watering hole in San Clemente, employs 20 muscled young men as "models" for customers to punch and scream at.

"Customers can specify how they want the models to appear -- they can even appear as women -- and then they are free to give them a sound beating," the Sun Post said.

The bar charges from $10 to $40 for the pleasure.

If violence does not work, counselors -- students from near by universities -- are at hand to dispense advice, the newspaper quoted the owner of the bar, Sydney Carton, as saying.

Sydney said that since he has been providing this service, beginning in April, most of the patrons have been women, most of whom work in bars and restaurants in South Orange Co.

At least this paddle assisted craft stayed to the south. (Before it sank)

How many times must we say this?: Paddle assisted craft must go south of Dogpatch!

Ohana Kemp Luau

The Ohana Kemp Surfboards 11th annual Luau at San Onofre was a great success again. Hats off to Dennis, Jody and Cody Kemp for feeding the masses and giving everyone a great time. Six beautiful surfboards built by Dennis were raffled off along with 100's of other great items. The surf was good most of the day and the sun was shining all day long. I would also like to say goodbye to Point Local Larry Cobb ( COBBO) Master shaper for Infinity Surfboards who is moving to Mexico. Sorry I missed your going away party Larry, but I was involved in the Luau and it was a very long day. My best to you and wife and look forward to your visits at The Point when you come up.

San Onofre Surf Camp, 2006. Thats the instructor in the blue shirt.

Andy Rooney says

Why do certain parts of the anatomy continue to grow? While others do not. Take for instance my eye brows, they have been this long sense I was in my mid thirties or so. My ears and nose have gotten a lot bigger too.

I had surgery once, they shaved me from stem to stern. When all the hair grew back, it was the same length as far as I could tell.

My fingers,toes and feet have been the same size sense I was probable twenty one. I was six feet two back then, I think I am a little shorter now and probable weigh a little more too. My suite size is about the same, except for the waist size on my pants.

Can you imagine if certain other parts of the anatomy continued to grow? Things that I can't mention here without a lot of flack. It would be really cool at first, but by the time you were my age it might be a problem. You would have to get it trimmed surgically. It would be painful and cost a lot of money. Thank God that hasn't happened yet.

authored by: Dr. Ralph

The locals at play

The action off shore at Sano seems to be heating up along with the water temp.

THE BEAUTIFUL WOMEN OF SAN ONOFRE

Dr. Ralph was in Wal-Mart buying a large bag of Purina for his dog and was in line to check out. A woman behind him asked if he had a dog. On impulse, he told her that no, he was starting The Purina Diet again, although he probably shouldn't because he'd ended up in the hospital last time, but that he'd lost 50 pounds before he awakened in an intensive care ward with tubes coming out of most of his orifices and IVs in both arms. He told her that it was essentially a perfect diet and that the way that it works is to load your pants pockets with Purina nuggets and simply eat one or two every time you feel hungry & that the food is nutritionally complete so he was going to try it again. I have to mention here that practically everyone in the line was by now enthralled with Dr. Ralph's story, particularly a fat lady behind her. Horrified, she asked if he'd been poisoned and was that why he was in the hospital? He said no...He'd been sitting in the street licking his balls and a car hit him.

motorhome update

Our friend has been camping out all week at the gate. Ranger P. found out this morning that he works for the Power Plant and he has been camping free by parking at the gate, and when the gate opens he drives down to the asphalt lot and camps out. Ranger P. has now told him no more, he can park in the Edison Power Plant parking lot and camp out or be ticketed for illegal camping. This type of person who does not even use the beach can cause the Rangers to start ticketing anyone who parks at the gate before 6am. Why? Because the're to cheap to pay for a campsite, but they don't have to! They can use the Edison lot or Edison has a lot on the mesa that most employees use for camping when they are working for weeks at a time. This is why we need to do our best to keep the Rangers from closing down the morning lineup, and to keep on allowing us to line up early. This should also apply to the 4way stop. Don't just think of yourself, think of everyone that loves to use San Onofre. If there's a line, get in it, don't try to cut it!

IS GLOBAL WARMING A PROBLEM?

(CBS) This story originally aired on March 19, 2006.

As a government scientist, James Hansen is taking a risk. He says there are things the White House doesn't want you to hear but he's going to say them anyway.

Hansen is arguably the world's leading researcher on global warming. He's the head of NASA's top institute studying the climate. But as correspondent Scott Pelley first reported last spring, this imminent scientist says that the Bush administration is restricting who he can talk to and editing what he can say. Politicians, he says, are rewriting the science.

But he didn't hold back speaking to Pelley, telling 60 Minutes what he knows.
For those of you who did not see 60 Minutes I am publishing this excerp. Take the time to read the artcle and make your own judgment. Just log on to 60 Minutes.com.

The bubble-butt lady of Dogpatch.