909 WHITE TRASH INVADES SAN ONOFRE!

Those of you at Old Mans on Saturday saw it. The White Trash invasion! They fit every stereotype of the sub-speices. They drove up in beat up old pickups that they attempted to hop up, but only got as far as flaring the front fenders with a hack saw. One had a 70's era piece of schitt camaro type thing with nascar and heavy metal stickers. There were mullet hairdo's and partially shaved heads on the men while the women sported bleached hair with black roots. The bathing attire consisted of cut off jeans and courderoy's that hung half way down the ass. That was OK as their boxers were still up around the belly button. They all had some sort of chains attached to the pants. Let us not forget the pitbull that jumped out of the truck with no leash. When the dog leash rule was brought to his attention, he said it was OK and that he raises pit's and this one is friendly. Lunch consisited of cigarettes and beer, although I did see a few old fast food burgers floating around. One can't have lunch without distorted heavy metal music, right? Somehow they believed me when I said this was a music free zone and they turned it off. They all had some neat tatoo's on various body parts. Nothing the was legible or even clear enough to decipher. One was quite obviously a tweaker of some sorts, not weighing more then 110 pounds. Numerous festering soars and scars. Looked 50 although probably only 25. Since they parked right next to me, I could'nt help over hearing the conversation. The main topis was cousin Larry. Yep, ol' cousin Larry is getting out of prison next week don't you know? The consensous was that he was wrongly incarcerated. You see, cousin Larry's old lady was fooling around! So cousin Larry gets his shot gun and goes over to the house where the guy lives who cousin Larry's old lady was fooling around with to set things straight. But all cousin Larry did was shoot open the guy's door! They seemed to feel that since cousin Larry didn't shoot the guy or his old lady, he should never have been charged. But all this was OK because they were surfers! Either at a garage sale or the dump, they managed to aquire 3 surfboards. Classics they were with the longest being about 5' 3". My guess was that sometime in the early 80's someone tossed these boards out behind the doublewide. No waxing was needed as these boards still had the original wax. Of course it was black with dirt and had run down the sides on some of those hot 909 days. Since San Onofre is the best place to ride a board of that shape and vintage, out they went with the cut offs and chains. That lasted about 5 minutes as the cravings for nicotine and beer got the best of them. So, I had to leave. Fast forward to Sunday morning. It seems the concept of putting trash INTO a dumpster is a foreign concept. Amongst the usual hillbilly debris was a big fat loaded diaper.