Anonymous 2, I reside in Talega. You surfees have a problem with us because you can't afford to move here, which is good, we don't want you or your kind anyway.
I just spoke to the ranger and life gaurds Poho is closed. The Lathering of the Brides is 100% no go. The club is raising funds to build the toll road and other local breweries. Why would you want to put a positive spin on that???????
I was concerned about the contest this weekend so I went to the OFFICIAL Poheny Longboard Surfing Association site and thinking that there would be an update about the contest on the discussion board, instead I find this from May 16, 2007: Mark Calkens - an Alien inside a Human body? You Decide. near the top of the discussion list. Looking elsewhere on the site, there does not appear to be any update about the contest, just the prior notice that it was scheduled for this weekend at Hollywood & Vine. Probably the best thing to do is check their site often as the weekend approaches. The contact info from the site only gives a mailing address, but I will try to get more.
Here's the ACTUAL POST FROM THE ACTUAL PLSA DISCUSSION BOARD .
May 16, 2007
Mark Calkens - an Alien inside a Human body? You Decide.
His perfectly coiffed hair with natural looking waves. Hair that apprears lame always. Only a hair helmet would do the same thing. = Alien
Rides a board that is shaped like it is from bars. = Alien
Alternating programmed moods. Calm and Happy in the water. Nervous and occupied on land. Always. Never deviates. = Alien
Has tiny feet for a man, er being of his stature. = Alien
Flying saucers tormenting his newly purchased home in TV. Mark related this story to me. The mother ship dropping Mark off. = Alien
The Mark we know is the alien infected human that used to be Mark Calkens. He only eats Mexican food. Beans must be required for his species metabolism. = Alien
Mark curiously morphs to a being holding a microphone at any meeting. The electronics in a mic must call to his inhuman brain = Alien
Suddenly appears when there is free food. Unfindable when the food costs money. The Mark we now knows does not unerstand the monetary system. = Alien
Seems to walk by floating a inch off the ground. Flatulence provides propulsion. = Alien
Requires recharging. Note outlet on back of his mishapen, alien filled cranium. = Alien
Seen moving erratically after stalking around cars parked on the opposite side of the road at PohO. Must be licking paint = Alien
Lastly - friends with a certain Bot in MB. Bott already uncovered as a space and time traveller. Possible outerspace explorations already completed, some planned in the near future. Mind melding, I mean mind melting observed. = Aliens
Why am I scared of Poho? I too have witnessed the phenomenon you refer to Mr Cushman. Once I was pulling up to Poho as Alien Calkens was peeling off his wetsuit. Somehow it stuck to his fake outerlayer of Mark skin. A skin suit as you will...and his head and upper torso were revealed as the fake human suit slid from it's usual perch. Most troubing, was the hair. Yes! When the suit slid off...his hair helmet fell to the ground but did not hit. It levitated 2 inches above. reason? I beleive his hair helmet must not be soiled by dirt. Probably some Alien thing. Anyway...beneith his fake Mark skin he looked just like Richard Nixon...and he gave me the peace sign. Needless to say I am afraid now and each time he paddles out with a joint I leave the water. Re the food thing...I find if I keep a breakfast burito handy as an offering it usually distracts him when Mark tries to suck my brain through my thumb. Mmmm!
THIS IS BOBBY KAY. AND I AM SHOUTING!!!! I am an officer of the Poheny Longboard Surfing Association and I am STATING that the Bribes Contest is OFF... And whoever is running this hoax is flirting with REGAL ACTION if it does not STOP NOW!!! Signed PISSED OFF.....
Workers wanted for immediate job openings at San Onofre beach. Baring birth certificad and valid SS number. You will be hired on the spot. Apply at Bldg.#4. Daily pay in cash.
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22 comments:
It's about time. Good riddence to bad rubbish.
What he said. And good riddance to the Talega trash that ruined the place.
SS DW. Blown out again, West at 30 knots. Wall to wall whitecaps. Go look for work you ain't going nowheres.
[anon'#3]
Anonymous 2, I reside in Talega. You surfees have a problem with us because you can't afford to move here, which is good, we don't want you or your kind anyway.
Ron Brown is a hippie.
This is Mark Calkens as far as PLSA knows the contest is a no show. If this is a prank be a man and pee me.
I just spoke to the ranger and life gaurds Poho is closed. The Lathering of the Brides is 100% no go. The club is raising funds to build the toll road and other local breweries. Why would you want to put a positive spin on that???????
THE CONTEST IS AT HOLLYWOOD & VINE AND THE RANGERS AND LIFE GAURDS WORK ALL OF THAT AREA
I was concerned about the contest this weekend so I went to the OFFICIAL Poheny Longboard Surfing Association site
and thinking that there would be an update about the contest on the discussion board, instead I find this from May 16, 2007: Mark Calkens - an Alien inside a Human body? You Decide.
near the top of the discussion list. Looking elsewhere on the site, there does not appear to be any update about the contest, just the prior notice that it was scheduled for this weekend at Hollywood & Vine. Probably the best thing to do is check their site often as the weekend approaches. The contact info from the site only gives a mailing address, but I will try to get more.
Here's the ACTUAL POST FROM THE ACTUAL PLSA DISCUSSION BOARD .
May 16, 2007
Mark Calkens - an Alien inside a Human body? You Decide.
His perfectly coiffed hair with natural looking waves. Hair that apprears lame always. Only a hair helmet would do the same thing. = Alien
Rides a board that is shaped like it is from bars. = Alien
Alternating programmed moods. Calm and Happy in the water. Nervous and occupied on land. Always. Never deviates. = Alien
Has tiny feet for a man, er being of his stature. = Alien
Flying saucers tormenting his newly purchased home in TV. Mark related this story to me. The mother ship dropping Mark off. = Alien
The Mark we know is the alien infected human that used to be Mark Calkens. He only eats Mexican food. Beans must be required for his species metabolism. = Alien
Mark curiously morphs to a being holding a microphone at any meeting. The electronics in a mic must call to his inhuman brain = Alien
Suddenly appears when there is free food. Unfindable when the food costs money. The Mark we now knows does not unerstand the monetary system. = Alien
Seems to walk by floating a inch off the ground. Flatulence provides propulsion. = Alien
Requires recharging. Note outlet on back of his mishapen, alien filled cranium. = Alien
Seen moving erratically after stalking around cars parked on the opposite side of the road at PohO. Must be licking paint = Alien
Lastly - friends with a certain Bot in MB. Bott already uncovered as a space and time traveller. Possible outerspace explorations already completed, some planned in the near future. Mind melding, I mean mind melting observed. = Aliens
Here’s one of the follow up posts to that one.
poppy - 02:04pm Jul 30, 2007
Why am I scared of Poho? I too have witnessed the phenomenon you refer to Mr Cushman. Once I was pulling up to Poho as Alien Calkens was peeling off his wetsuit. Somehow it stuck to his fake outerlayer of Mark skin. A skin suit as you will...and his head and upper torso were revealed as the fake human suit slid from it's usual perch. Most troubing, was the hair. Yes! When the suit slid off...his hair helmet fell to the ground but did not hit. It levitated 2 inches above. reason? I beleive his hair helmet must not be soiled by dirt. Probably some Alien thing. Anyway...beneith his fake Mark skin he looked just like Richard Nixon...and he gave me the peace sign. Needless to say I am afraid now and each time he paddles out with a joint I leave the water. Re the food thing...I find if I keep a breakfast burito handy as an offering it usually distracts him when Mark tries to suck my brain through my thumb. Mmmm!
contact info, including a phone number, for the PLSA surf contest is here:
http://pohosurf.org/events.html
THIS IS BOBBY KAY. AND I AM SHOUTING!!!! I am an officer of the Poheny Longboard Surfing Association and I am STATING that the Bribes Contest is OFF... And whoever is running this hoax is flirting with REGAL ACTION if it does not STOP NOW!!! Signed PISSED OFF.....
IDOTS!!!!!
At least Spincter got some comments!
You zoo people on San-O Daze are totally wiggy. You are freakazoids, zonked out, trippy klowna-rama rama ding dongs.
coast to coast foam today. no glass off in sight. bompy, uneven,
cross chop. I'm calling it quits, and going home.
Workers wanted for immediate job openings at San Onofre beach. Baring birth certificad and valid SS number. You will be hired on the spot. Apply at Bldg.#4. Daily pay in cash.
It's so easy a caveman can do it...
whats the deal between mark caulkins and rubio, and how does katie fit in?
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