Monday, May 17, 2010

You'll Come Because Of The Apocalypse, You'll Stay For The Sloppy Joes

And I beheld when he had opened the sixth seal, and, lo, there was a great earthquake; and the sun became black as sackcloth of hair, and the moon became as blood; And the stars of heaven fell unto the earth...And the heaven departed as a scroll when it is rolled together; and every mountain and island were moved out of their places. [Revelations 6:12-14]

If you have a fear, there will always be someone willing to take your money and promise to save you. These guys near Barstow, California, promise to save you and serve you a diet including Sloppy Joes. You don't want to try to survive the Apocalypse on a diet of cream cheese in rolled tortillas, do you?

41 comments:

ANGRYWHITEMAN said...

DO THEY ACCOMODATE ILLEGAL ALIENS?

happy negro said...

Hey bow, is John Millious abd Lance Carson gonna be there and is the hugh school 'The Riffians'? Later, dude.

Anonymous said...

Ain't that the truth. Everything the Paskowitzes touch turns to gold.

Chuck Patterson said...

I live in a Co-ed apt with a bunch of women. Being a gay male, this doesn't do much for me. But when one of the girls who doesn't clean up and stinks worse than anything has her drunk ass "Boyfriend" over after cheating on him and making a failed attempt at fixing things. Well lets just say that I fixed things for him and can now say I got more out of that breakup than ever. It's an added bonus that this is what "sickened" you to the point of moving out. So now I get laid nightly by a very "well off" man, have a MUCH better roommate in your place, and since you paid for the entire year before you left we all get a discount on rent! I won't miss you Michelle, but something good had to come out of knowing you.

jake the snake said...

Beach Barrister, I love Barstow, however, I am pasadena on them bunker guys. NosireeBob, I make a beeline for the Bun Boy and order a few burgers for me and Mama to go, abd their world famous strawberry pie smothered with whipped cream.. Now that you mention to the blog it is no longer the best kept seceret in Kern County.

STUPIDWHITEMAN said...

I am voting Democrat because I don’t want to wipe my own ass any more, and the government’s sloppy job is alright with me.

huell said...

Say, Whitey, if you done wanna' be angry no more head up here to the Bun Boy in Barstow and order a big slice of rhubarb pie. It'll put a smile on your face alright.

barstow bob said...

Attn:: Sydney Carton Esq. why don't youse do a story on Sloppy Seconds now that you done Sloppy Joe's.

okie tom said...

Holy smoke, what's happened to this Blog. I paid good money to San-O Daze for a subscription, and all I get is pee oh'd white guy, a happy knee grow, some STD that's gay as gay can be, somebody claiming to be Jake the Snake, and Barstow Bob himself. Now, they got a lot of guys on the masthead, but know body wants to take the reins. Get with it.

Anonymous said...

Once again, Putzle has dropped the ball.

synonymous anonymous said...

Yes, he sure did, didn't he. Why Puttzle.

Anonymous said...

Listen boys, the 99 weeks of unemployment is a thing of the past and Putzel and Screwball are in deep. Living on the dole has some big time unintended consequences and the hammer has fallen. God save their lazy stupid souls.

east bakersfield ed said...

Anon'#3, those two are classic examples why an educatioon is importanant. Puttzle and CueBall are typical of those possessing
merely a 5th grade education.

Murphy said...

Walk on a rainbow trail; walk on a trail of song,
and all about you will be beauty.
There is a way out of every dark mist, over a rainbow trail.

dawn patrol said...

0630: blown out to hell, south wind. Sorry!

Lao Tse said...

Blown out south is still better than another Murphy poetry reading.

TA DA said...

Will someone please stick a fork in Murphy, I think he's done.

red mountain said...

Beach Barrisrter, cream cheese gives me a severe case of the Italian Squirts, however, I don't know why. Oppps, gotta' run.

Merriam Webster said...

1. tube steak

Army lingo for the male sexual organ; the penis. Typically used in the phrase "tube steak & white gravy," a reference to an ejaulating penis, inserted into one of the drill/platoon/top sergeants' numerous gay slurs directed at subordinates.
"You're going to love the main course at the chow hall," the D.I. told the raw-ass recruit. "It's tube steak & white gravy and you can have all you want!"
pecker cock wang wang jism jizm jizz splooge

Mirriam Webster said...

2. Tube's Steak and Lobster House

confused said...

This here Sydney Carton Esq. is a fearmonger attempting to cause panic, disruption, chaos, and mass confusion. I just don't get it.

scared schitless said...

Sydney Carton Jr. is a beligerent for sure. He sure scares we beginner surfboard riders at San Onofre surf beach near Trestles CA.

Ahnuld Shwarztkopf said...

Time to blow up this IDIOTIC web page

DAILEY VARIETY said...

Arnold, sweetreart baby. Hold off. tomorrow is the official announcement of the GIANT Paskowitz major motion picture starring Sean Penn as Stanford medical student, Dorian Paskowitz. Also starring Julia Robrts as Julliete Paskowitz. The working title is "Odyssey The Paskowitz Story". It is scheduled for November release.

Murphy said...

There is an eagle in me that wants to soar,
and there is a hippopotamus in me
that wants to wallow in the mud.

Anonymous said...

Murphy, don't sweat the hippo bit, just wallow in self pity. You deserve it.

amittyville said...

Say, what became of the GWS scare. Were they spotted again at the Point, or did they swim back to The Dogpatch. I'm sure I saw the remains of the little boy at SONGS. I'm fearful of entering the ocean. I just returned home, but what was the BFD at Barstow and the Bun Boy and the strawberry pies smothered in whipped cream?

billy goatt said...

GOTTA GET DRUNK FIRST, why?

li'l oscar said...

Not only is Barstow known for Sloppy Joe's, they are internationlly famous for their giant kielbasa, believe it or not.

hard tines & bad news said...

Okay, here's the deal schlemiel. I left work early and headed straight for Old 'Nofre. The State
laid off all lifeguards and rangers from Trail 6 to the Point. There's nobody to check us ]plastic red cuppers. It has opened the flood gates for the booze- hounds, and you know who they are.
And, boy, are we gonna let the good times roll alright. I don't know how long this lat-off will be, but it should last the summer. The randers and lifeguards will be lucky if they can work the
toll-booth, that's how bad things are.

desperate said...

Sy Esq., you're the only one able to save this miserable blog at this stage of the game. Plese help us. Please.

Happy Shautfer said...

If you think your life stinks, you should smell mine!

Anonymous said...

Happy, no, thanks.

Anonymous said...

This southern hemmie is a good smell!

i've even been five in the night said...

barstow bob: there ain't no shame in being second.

Lady Di said...

Blog has been dead for months, now it begining to stink to high heaven.

Barstow Bob said...

Lady Di, are you really 'Lady Diarreah?

Anonymous said...

Gale force winds hit 'Nofre again.

Anonymous said...

Old 'Nofre has never been blown out this bad--ever. You cain't even paddle out.

Miki Dorian said...

U phreaks are so boring,humourles it's knot even bunny!

rex said...

Okay Miki, repeat after me. The rain in Spain stays mainly in the plain.

Moon Phase