Saturday, April 30, 2005

Mini-Mayor takes a mate

It would seem that our beloved Mini-Mayor has found a mate. This morning while feeding him, I was watching one on his holes and watching him pull down the fodder which I was placing at his hole entrance, then I saw another hole about 10 ft away and saw what I thought was Mini poking his head out of the other hole. As I placed a piece of fodder at the other hole, I saw both pieces (one at each hole) disappear at the same time, which can only mean that there are 2 gophers. They seem very happy working together, we hope to see little Mini-Mini's running around soon. More later-----Maybe!

Back In Puttzle's Corner

Hello all. Thanks to the Mayor and surfsister, we had a report for yesterday. I thank both of them for stepping in for me during my brief absence. According to the Mayor and Joe in his Shorts, today was a little better, at least in the beginning. As we drove in, I saw a few nice looking waves at the Bar and Point. 2-4. As I was suiting up, a bigger set rolled through. It looked decent enough, not too walled up, but not great. Looked like fun. Out I went. I probably got 5 or 6 waves, all lefts, then came on in. It seemed like as each minute ticked by, the waves got crappier, more walled up and a little more washing machine-ish. It did not help that the tide was dropping, obviously that was the reason. Still all-in-all a nice session.

I snapped 1 speeder, mainly because after I came in, there weren't that many. Plus I was kind of locked into watching the scene in the water. I haven't seen it that crowded in a while. With the contest at Trestles, which by the way looked to be firing on all cylinders early, San-O was getting the bleed off. The short boarders were all over at the Sandbar as the tide dropped, getting some nice rides. Whatever, I still think they shouldn't come to San Onofre, leave it to the longboarders. Like that would ever happen! Hopping, snaking, crashing and floundering everywhere were the ever present Talegalites. I took more pictures and will stick some on the picture blog if they aren't all junk. The 3 part sequence featured below was one of the rides of the day.

Part 1. Is that Fluffy cruising by outside?!?

Part 2.

Part 3.

Whoops! Doing the crab.

Friday, April 29, 2005


Well with Puttzle not around this morning things were pretty boring. The surf was a good 4 to 6 ft offshore winds,but still kind of sloppy with some rideable waves. Not very crowded either. The speeders were on a tear this morning and some inland group was having a party at OLDMANS. Mini-Mayor was out and about this morning collecting his food supply. And poor RM this morning had to swim a couple of times. RM, wear a leash, I hate to see you swim like that and miss some waves because of it, (but it is fun to watch you CRAB cross the rocks). Osifer K was ripping this morning, TB JOE was having a little difficulty this morning getting out, and Nextel L was getting his share, Joe-in-his-shorts was happy to get wet but not to happy with the surf. The low tide really made things worsen and the Sand-Bar was pounding. But it was a beautiful morning all in all. See you at the beach. More later-----maybe.

Thursday, April 28, 2005


unt Puttle will be gone for about a 24 hour period and will not be visiting the blog. I will not be attending the Friday San Onofre opening, so all the speeders and various other oddities should take that time to do their thing. Let the puttzle bashing commence (that means start).

A friend just mailed me this picture of Saddleback this morning.

Puttzle's Corner

Wow, there is a sneaker swell this morning with hardly anybody out! I'm headed back down because there is absolutely no crowd. Get on it people!

The Sandbar is going off!

Would-Be Car Burglar Locks Self in Trunk

Tuesday, April 26, 2005

San Onofre, Calif. (AP) - A man attempting to burglarize a kiosk over the weekend locked himself in the trunk and was swiftly arrested, rangers said. A security guard for So. Cal. Edison followed a trail of blood to a banging noise coming from the trunk in the early morning hours Sunday. Park rangers responding to the scene expected to find a victim, but instead discovered the burglar. "Genius, pure genius," said Murphy the Mayor of San Onofre. Rangers said he cut himself on the door of the kiosk, then trickled blood across the parking lot to the car he eventually locked himself inside. The man initially told rangers he had been hit on the head and stuffed in the trunk, but rangers found items stolen from another kiosk inside the trunk with the suspect. "He popped the trunk and crawled in there to stash 300 annual passes," Murphy said. "But then he grabs the trunk to heave himself out and closes it on top of him. He's got to be the dumbest criminal of the day." The man was taken to Talega Medical Center to be treated for cuts, then to the San Diego County Jail to be booked on two counts of theft. Rangers did not identify the suspect.

Mini Mayor gets a bath.

Wednesday, April 27, 2005

Rangers targeting 'slap' attackers

The assault is videoed and then texted to friends. Rangers say they are targeting young people involved in a new trend of assaults in which they "slap" surfers in the face for no apparent reason. Gangs of locals are said to record pictures of the assaults on their mobile phones and then text them to their friends. Rangers said the assaults at San Onofre Surf Beach were serious incidents and would not be tolerated. Supt Hal Dairywimple, of the state parks, said eight people had already been charged over this type of assault. He said: "We treat this very seriously. This is a priority crime for the state. "The message I want to get across is that this is not fun. This is an assault." Many other beaches are also concerned about the phenomenon. One beach, in south Orange County, has banned surfers from carrying mobile phones to the beach entirely. Pastor Ralph, head teacher of St Martin-in-the-Fields High School Surf Class which frequents San Onofre said: "If I found pupils were doing this I would take this very seriously and actually treat it as bullying and exclude them for a fixed term from school."

Puttzle's Corner

What an awful morning for surf. Total crap! 1 to maybe 3 foot, south wind, cloudy and junky all the way around. Not much else going on.

Fellow surfer's, as I've said before, it's not all about you and it's not all about me when surfing. The whole experience should be one of joy...for everyone out there. I know for some of you this would be hard to do, but occasionally, why not turn to somebody in the line-up and say, "Hey, go ahead, it's your turn", even if the guy is a total kook. People who know me know that is how I am, I've said before that I get a certain amount of satisfaction seeing someone get a good wave. It's not like I really want to give a wave away, there are many, many times I'll give one up that I would really rather have gone on. I'm in the better position, but hey, SHARE! I have even complimented guys on good rides who I cannot really stand because they are either hoppers or hoggers. Amazingly, they will look at me with shock in their eyes, but a smile on their face. Well, OK not all of them, some just give me the "stink-eye", paddle back out and proceed to go on the next wave that comes, F*ck everyone else. Them be a**holes. Years ago, the surfing community was much smaller and there was a lot more camaraderie amongst the tribe members. Those are my roots. Surfers passing on the road would signal each other, thumbs up or thumbs down. Now what you get is the middle finger. People were much more helpful. I remember surfing Honolua in the early 70's and consistently getting my butt kicked when I would go for a tube ride. The lip would drive my nose into the water and I would eat it. A guy who I surfed with a lot, seeing my struggles, paddled up to me and gave me a tip. He said this is what you do to make those. It was a very simple thing, but it changed my surfing for the better, I started making those tube rides. I've never forgotten Mike Morris for that tip, he will remain in my memory forever. THAT is what surfing is about fellows! Or rather, that's how it used to be. Think about it.

Due to the bad light this morning, most of the speeders were out of focus, but I did nab 1. Final tabulation of votes is complete and we have, by a unanimous vote, our first inductee into the Hall of Shame.

No comment.

The Riverside High School surf team down at Old Man's for their Wednesday morning session.

Tuesday, April 26, 2005

Puttzle's Corner

The waves were a bit cleaner this morning, maybe 2-4 feet. I ventured out figuring I'd get a little exercise if nothing else. I actually got a few nice rides, including a left that simply made my day, surf-wise at least. Offshore wind to start, around 8:00 it died and glassed off. The tide is rising and it might get pretty darn good. The only drawback is that the sets are VERY inconsistent. Fortunately, the crowd was minimal, I counted 12 guys at 8:30. For once, the amount of guys kind of matched what was out there.

The mayor, still recuperating from his foot injury, showed for opening, said hello to the Mini-Mayor, then drove off in his Talexus. Must be nice.

I'm sorry if I have offended anyone (well, besides FH) with my stating facts. Like I said, if the shoe fits, wear it. On the blogs, so far I have received almost unanimous support. At the beach, it's a different matter. Still overwhelmingly positive, but there are a few people who are giving me the cold shoulder (you know who you are). A few have voiced their displeasure to me, I appreciate that, but this IS my blog and I do what I want here, it's kind of like my own kingdom. I don't imagine the "cold shoulderers" will read this, because if that's the way they feel, then they shouldn't be coming around this blog! Simple. Don't like the show, turn it off. If by chance they do read this, then I have questions. Why not vote against FH's induction into the Fun Sucker's Hall of Shame? Post a comment, do SOMETHING!!! I am extending the vote until noon tomorrow. Whether you like me or my blogging means nothing to me. Whether you are sociable to me doesn't bother me either.

It's a beautiful day so far, enjoy it!




State Park Fined for Throwing Out Kissing Homosexuals

SAN ONOFRE (Reuters) - A gay couple who were thrown out of San Onofre Surf Beach in 2003 for kissing won an appeal Monday against an earlier court ruling that cleared the state of sexual discrimination. The Court of Appeals in Laguna Beach ordered State Park ranger Hal Dairywimple to pay $50,000 in damages and to cover the legal costs of San Onofre's ombudsman against sexual discrimination, SO-CLU, which filed the appeal. Dairywimple asked Patrick Fitzgerald and Gerald Fitzpatrick to leave his beach after they kissed and later told other rangers he did not let anyone engage in such behavior on his beach regardless of their sexual orientation. Laguna Beach District Court cleared him of discrimination, a charge that can result in a year in jail, in the country's first test of legislation against sexual discrimination in the state park system. But SO-CLU director Hans Van Puttzle said the appeals court found the state failed to prove "these two boys behaved in a way that would justify telling them to stop or telling them to leave the premises." "The Court of Appeals has made it clear that discriminating on grounds of sexual orientation is a serious violation of people's rights and can cost you dearly," he told Reuters. "This will hopefully function as an effective deterrent."

Monday, April 25, 2005

San Onofre Mayor Murphy Resigns Amid Probe

Film at 11.


1. Golf is a lot like taxes - you drive hard to get to the green and end up in the hole.
2. Are you wearing your golfer's socks? The pair with a hole in one.
3. The musician in jail was anxiously awaiting his next release.
4. Two clock makers argued and got ticked off.
5. To golf at your favorite course may require a long drive.
6. Outdoor lights were put up at a golf course - for people who liked swinging nightclubs.
7. She became a golf professional to earn her bread and putter.
8. As a golfer you have to have good fore-sight.
9. Golfers would wear wrinkled clothes if it weren't four irons.
10. The fact that he was a bad golfer was a fore-gone conclusion
11. A racer who was also a golfer really knew how to drive.
12. He would promise to play golf, but he didn't know how to follow through.
13. Golfers hate cake because they might get a slice.
14. Expensive golf clubs are par for the course.
15. If you golf on election day -- cast an absent-tee ballot.
16. A man named Jim Golf offered training on building golf courses called Golf's golf course course.
17. A photographer taking pictures of golfers says 'watch the birdie'.
18. The sound that a golf cart makes is: 'putt..putt..putt'.

Puttzle's Corner

The surf was kind of mixed up this morning. Peaks all over the place with not much to them. There were some sets that would roll through, but it's a lot more lined up on those than yesterday. Of course, the -0.9 tide did not help matters. Even as the tide came in, things didn't improve all that much. Puttzle did not surf, he shot photos. Not well due to focusing issues, but pictures none the less. Since today is Sheriff Bob's birthday, he gets the San-O Daze showcase. Everyone else needs to check puttzle's pics. If you were speeding, go to the speeder's blog.

I was asked to request that people refrain from calling Mah-tan by his other nickname, you know the one. Same as Skip's buddy on the old TV show, Skip and (rhymes with Party), if you can remember that far back. I told him that would not be a good idea because that would make it open season on him. Kind of like the infamous FH. Maybe by not actually putting the nickname on here it won't be so bad. I doubt it.

I urge you to cast your vote as there are less than 24 hours left. Look for the second nominee later tomorrow. Think Sandbar kook.

Part 1. Birthday Bob.

Part 2.

Part 3.

Sunday, April 24, 2005

Slander You Say?

I submit the definition of Slander, straight from
  1. Law. Oral communication of false statements injurious to a person's reputation.
  2. A false and malicious statement or report about someone.
I have NEVER, I repeat, NEVER, done this (well ok, maybe to the Mayor). In the case of FH, what I said was the truth, the whole truth, and nothing but the truth, He Hops! Malicious? Possible. A false statement? Not a chance. No slander that I can see. Besides, his reputation preceded him.

Now let's look at Libel.

1. A false publication, as in writing, print, signs, or pictures, that damages a person's reputation.
2. The act of presenting such material to the public.

Nope. Once again, I spoke the truth, I am sorry if it hurts. I will NOT back down, folks. If the shoe fits...

Sunday Service

There is surf this morning, but the conditions are terrible. It looks to have a better direction than yesterday, if the conditions were good it would be EPIC! There are some nice size and shaped lefts rolling through the Point. The Produce Guy, Mr. Initials P.A., Bossman Richard, TB, Sheriff Bob (welcome back!) and few other went out. I know they were actually having fun as they were getting some decent rides. I am happy for them!

The rain was just starting to get heavier when I left a little after 7. On my way home, it was pouring in San Clemente. As I hit the Vista Hermosa offramp area, it stopped. Dana Point is minimally wet. Looks like the rain falls mainly in San Clemente, which I am sure is due to the Talega influence.

I am going to start a new blog where, after consulting with my attorney, I just may name a few names, if you know what I mean. I will describe as much as possible about you so others can be on the lookout. Pictures? Maybe. The name of the blog? Fun Suckers Hall of Shame. You want to suck the fun out of the surfing experience for others in the water? You just may show up on that site. I'm not talking about the people who occasionally have a lapse, heck I could include myself in that group. I'm talking about the people who everyone else has warned me about, who every time I watch, they personify a**hole. Surfing is not about catching EVERY wave that comes through when you are in the line-up, there's more to it than that. If you don't know what I am talking about, I feel sorry for you. You don't have a clue and never will. This makes you a menace to society...kind of like me! Have a problem with this? Find 'puttzle' under "Contributors", click the name, then click 'email', I'd love to here from you.

Stay dry.


Go Hatman!

The Produce Salesman.

Mr. Initials P.A.

Saturday, April 23, 2005

So Sorry!

Well, it finally happened, I've pissed someone off. My work here is done. FYI (that stands for "For Your Information", not "F**d You Idiot"), everything and everyone is fair game around here, myself included. He accuses me of slander. I have never completely named him, if people can figure out who I am talking about, well good for them. He mentions using images without permission. Umm, dimwit, I'm not making one cent on this blog or on my totally professional pictures, I don't believe that getting someone's permission applies here. I may be wrong on that, but can I help it if somebody just happens along as I am shooting a picture of the surf?

Shiny Surfboard: $650.00
Fancy Wetsuit: $275.00
Getting your HOPPING mug plastered all over the internet: PRICELESS!

Isn't the internet fun? So sue me...

Scratching My Head In Puttzle's Corner

My, my, my, the surf is even bigger this morning. Excellent conditions in the beginning, solid 2-4 feet with some multiple wave sets, 4, 5, 6 waves in a set. I was first in the water and grabbed a few until I didn't like the crowd anymore. I surfed for about 45 minutes to an hour and had a lot of fun. Everyone else, I mean everyone, had drifted over to Four Doors, so I had the Point to myself until Joe in his wetsuit and some lame-o came over. That was fine as Joe and I had our choice. I caught a couple and as I was paddling back out, looked back and 6 guys were scrambling to come out where we were. Time to exit and snap pictures. Plenty SPEEDERS.

There are two pictures of Panaman below. Now Panaman is one of the mellowest people in the water. I can count on two fingers the times I have seen him get upset out there. On each of the two waves pictured, he was screaming down the line and each time, just at the critical juncture, these two HOPPERS took off. And stuffed him. Totally clueless people. These were two of the best waves of the morning, ones where the guy was in a great position. After the second one, we saw him paddling over to the HOPPER for a few words. I'm standing on the beach, jumping up and down yelling "F*CKING HOPPER!" because I cannot stand that, especially when it's a friend getting HOPPED on an excellent wave. When Panaman came in, I asked him what happened. He said that after he vented, the guy said, "What's the big deal, it's San-O", or something to that effect. Panaman said he just lost it at that point. I can't blame him. If it was me, I don't know how I would have reacted, probably nowhere as nice as Panaman.

So on that note, there are additional pictures of the Taleglites as well as the crew on the picture blog.

Where's Sheriff Bob? He'd be all over this! Four Doors.

Panaman getting HOPPED AGAIN!

Panaman behind some HOPPER!

Friday, April 22, 2005

Plain Ole Puttzle's Corner

The surf was a bit bigger today, every now and then a nice head-high, maybe slightly overhead (for the vertically challenged) set would roll through. When I say every now and then, I mean every 15 or 20 minutes. When I left, it definitely looked to be getting a bit more consistent. I went out, looking back I guess it was worth it. I got some ok waves but my surfing wasn't up to par. Part of the reason was the surf, part was me. Sumdays lie dat. I know it wasn't all me, because Mr. Lucas, upon paddling out, informed me that the Mayor said I needed to "Get some more schooling". I looked at the beach and saw the Mayor was nowhere in sight, I think he was napping in his camper. I asked Mr. L. if Murphy said that and he smiled and said No. He then proceeded to do the kook-a-choo. A couple of times. I didn't feel so bad and realized that the surf was partly to blame. Sounds good anyway.

Winds were all over the place, mostly side to offshore. Gusting then dying. However, the flags are all from the south and I think it's going to get blown to you know where. It must be some holiday because there is quite a mob at the Point, I will post some photos of the fun and of course, speeders, all 3 of them. Only three because most went by before I was in the shooting mode. Lucky them.

Go Hatman!



Twin Takes Candidate's Place in Parade

SAN ONOFRE - Mayoral candidate Murphy acknowledged Wednesday that his twin brother took his place in a parade this week, waving at onlookers who mistook the stand-in for the candidate. Murphy told The Associated Press he had a conflicting event and didn't intend to deceive anyone when Mayor Murray from Doheny walked in the parade. "We can't help that we look like each other," said Murphy, a surfer / golfer and leading contender for the mayor's post. As many as 250,000 people gathered along the famous dirt road to watch the decorated SUV's drive by on Saturday night. Many mistook the Doheny guy for the mayoral hopeful. "When he was waving, they would say, 'Murphy,' and he would say 'No, it's Murray,' but you can't really yell at 200,000 people along the route," Murphy said. Beach parade announcer Jim Irwin told radio station KFI, which first reported the story, that materials provided to him showed Murphy— not his brother — among passengers on the City Council float. He said he wasn't told about the replacement. "I thought it was Murphy myself, as I'm sure tens of thousands of others did," said Ranger Hal Dairywimple. Mayor Murphy did not immediately return a phone call to his office from The Associated Press. A woman who answered said the surfer was at the golf course that afternoon. Dairywimple said he believes the parade appearance was dishonest and deceptive. "If you're 18 years old and having a date, it might be a youthful prank when you swap out your brother, but when you're running for mayor of a beach with 1.3 million people and sending in your brother as an impersonator ... I do see a problem with it," Dairywimple said.

Thursday, April 21, 2005

Surf Beach Gunman Puts Van 'Out of Its Misery'

SAN ONOFRE, Ca. - A man with car trouble is in trouble after shooting five rounds into the hood of his Dodge van "to put my van out of its misery." Unt Puttzle shot his 1975 Dodge van with a .380-caliber semiautomatic, Park rangers said. When the attendant at the kiosk asked what he was doing, Unt Puttzle said, "I'm putting my van out of its misery." He tucked his gun in a pocket and went surfing. He was arrested Wednesday on a misdemeanor charge of discharging a firearm in public. He posted $100 bail Thursday. Unt Puttzle said the van has been giving him trouble for years and had "outlived its usefulness." He called the shooting "dumb" and worries he will be forced to move out of state. But he doesn't regret it. "I think every guy in the universe has wanted to do it," Unt Puttzle told the Daily Sun-Post. "It was worth every damn minute in that jail." The EPA may also press charges as one of the rounds blew through the transmission spilling fluid into an ecological preserve. Another round pierced the engine block, but there was no oil in it to leak out.

Hanging In Puttzle's Corner

Surf was miniscule this morning, at least to start. McTavish Bob was the solo surfer for probably a good 15 minutes before others hit the water. I'd say it's 1-2 with maybe a 3 footer once in a great while. Very inconsistent, enough waves for 3 or maybe 4 people. However, when I left there were too many for what was there. Needless to say, I stayed out and shot pictures. The speeders were out, so I snapped a few pictures of them.

I am having a lot of trouble this morning trying to post photos and have been failing in my attempts to update the picture site. Eventually it will work, so check it out a bit later.


Icon, after speeding.

Fluffy on her morning cruise.



Skinny surfers are falling into enormous toilets - and fat tourist are to blame.

SAN ONOFRE: "The state parks are installing bigger toilets to accommodate the increasing size of tourists butts," says Adrian Greenbaum of People Opposing Outsized Potties (POOP). "As a result, slim people have to perch on the edge of the seat and are in terrible danger of falling into the water and drowning. If you manufacture a toilet the size of a hot tub to cater to big fat kooks, bad things are going to happen." Greenbaum says outsized toilets are being installed in thousands of beaches and campgrounds and to date, more than 200 thin people have fallen off their perch on the seat and plunged into the water. "Thank goodness there have been no fatalities so far," he says. "But it's only a matter of time. A friend of mine was surfing at San Onofre and they had a toilet seat big enough to accommodate three normal people.Unfortunately he fell into the water and accidentally flushed at the same time. 'I could have been swept out to sea,' he told me. 'It was like being caught under the Niagara Falls.' "

Wednesday, April 20, 2005

Medical Updates

Ever wonder who I am talking about when I refer to The Olympic Gold Medal Winner? Follow the link and find out a little about this fiesty fellow. Then keep him in your thoughts and prayers for a speedy recovery. Oh yeah, Grumpy broke his hand so say a prayer for him also. Don't worry about the Mayor's sharkbit a**, he will recover.

The View From Puttzle's Corner

What a lovely day it be! Surf was decent this morning. The tide was a bit on the high side, but some fun surf was there to be had. We did. 2-4 feet, great conditions, minimal crowd at the start. I guess the unexpected early opening of the park took many by surprise. After two days of work, the road is now nice and even, just right for all the speeders. By the way, water temp according to my thermometer strip was 63. Nice.

Osifer K. finally returned to the early morning crew, it was good to see him. The most stunning turn of events this morning was the appearance in the water of THE MAYOR! Now THAT took EVERYONE by surprise. We had to walk him through the proper techniques, but he is a quick learner (for an old guy) and soon was surfing like the Murphy of old. Every time he took off he would yell "FORE!" and act like he was teeing off. Then he'd walk to the nose (cross-stepping of course) and pretend to putt. He even did one of those Tiger Woods fist pumps.

The photo below is of one of three guys who went out at a spot the boys were calling Buffoon's Lagoon, straight off the Church parking lot. That place just THUMPS, due to the shallowness and shape of the beach. Not really a place to surf. Usually people who go out there are in for a big surprise and are simply clueless. These guys however, were having a blast and actually riding some of the waves successfully. Whoda thunk.

The fun continues on puttzle's pics.

Wooo-hooo! Buffoon's Lagoon.



Larry. 4.20.2005

Taxidermist Turns Your Dead Pets Into Pillows

News Edition: 04/18/2005

San Clemente (AP) - A U.S. taxidermist has come up with a strange way to keep the memory of dead pets alive - cushions made from their fur. Dr. Ralph gets bereaved animal owners to send him their pets' bodies - which he then transforms into pillows and cushions. The soft furnishings feature the hair of your cat or dog on one side and the fabric of your choice on the other. And he has already sold hundreds of the Pet Pillows across the world in just a couple of months. Dr. Ralph from San Clemente, admits some people are initially shocked by the idea. But he said most animal lovers were thrilled by the chance to have a permanent reminder of their four-legged friends, such as a Mayor from San Onofre who had a gopher made into a golf ball cover.

Tuesday, April 19, 2005


I haven't quite figured this blog out yet. Very Weird.

Man admits leaving photos of genitals on cars

Apr. 14, 2005 11:22 AM

SAN ONOFRE - A 41-year-old man is behind bars today after he told rangers he left photos of his genitals on the vehicles of up to 100 women parked at surf beach, officials said. Rangers arrested the man on Tuesday on suspicion of public display of explicit sexual materials, public sexual indecency, possession of dangerous drugs and drug paraphernalia, park ranger Sgt. Hal Dairywimple said. Rangers have been investigating at least 30 reports of photos left on the cars of women since 1999. Dairywimple said rangers are working with the FBI on possible additional cases. Rangers got a break in the case when a man left DNA when he touched himself in front of women at two separate locations in November and December. The DNA from both samples matched and was placed into the national Combined DNA Index System (CODIS). Last month, rangers got a match to the DNA linking the crimes the suspect. Detectives began surveillance and said they saw him place a photo of his genitals on a woman's car Tuesday at 5:35 p.m. at the Point. He is being held in a San Diego County jail on an $18,000 bond, rangers said.

Man Seeks Library for 'Real' 1st President

San Onofre, Ca. (AP) - A Malibu man believes the first person to lose an election under the San Onofre Surf Club Articles of Confederation, Tracy Terry of Malibu, was technically the San Onofre Surfing Club's first president.

Official club records indicate that Terry received just 2 votes, but a recently uncovered diary belonging to a P. Proctor, indicate the election was rife with fraud and that Terry was the winner. Barney Wilkes, the man who actually served as president, was declared the winner.

Now, Bill Stanley is seeking $10 million from the club to build a presidential library for Terry in Malibu. Stanley, president of the Tubesteak Historical Society, asked the San Onofre Surf Club Board of Directors on Monday night to donate $1 million from funds it expects to receive from Chuckie Cheese Restaurants. Stanley is also seeking funding from the State Parks. "Facts are on our side. History is on our side, the first president came from Malibu. We should have a presidential library," he said at a news conference. "The first election was rigged, that's why he lost. The Club needs to right this wrong and fork over the money."

However, San Onofre Mayor Murphy has a different take on plans to use the $1 million from Chuckie Cheese Restaurants. "I want a Barney Wilkes presidental library", said the Mayor. "Mr. Terry has been crying this tune for years. It's time he moved on. Barney was a great president and deserves this honor, for he is truly a legend."



Wrong Bath Lands Legend in Hot Water

SAN CLEMENTE (Reuters) - A Surfing legend returning from an evening's blogging has landed in hot water after climbing into a relaxing hot bath in someone else's condo. The 70-year-old legend from San Clemente, was arrested and charged with unlawful entry after being discovered late Friday night in the bath tub of a condo about 50 yards from his own, police said. "I can't believe it wasn't my bath," ABC television quoted the legend, as telling investigators.

Tuesday In Puttzle's Corner

I made the trip down to San-O this morning, not for the surf, which I knew was blown out, but to check on the road grading/paving progress. The workcrew, led by the erstwhile Builder Bob, have done a wonderful job so far. Initial grading is complete. Today's work will entail filling and rearranging parking areas, pouring a slab in the Tiki Hut and moving the shack to the end of the road. The shack will first be disassembled, each piece carefully numbered, trailered to the end of the road, then reassembled. SOSC BOD asks any available SOSC member to show up tomorrow to assist in the reassembly. Paving should start Thursday and be completed that same day, weather permitting of course. By Friday, the park should reopen.

Ranger D. has informed me that starting May 1, 2005, RV's longer than 28 feet will not be allowed in the park. They will be required to park in the upper Edison lot, by the kiosk. SCE, always the friendly, helpful neighbor, has graciously given the state use of the lot.

The surf, as I said, is blown out as you can see from the picture. That's a bummer because there is some nice sized surf and it would be good with the right conditions. Looking at the weather for the next 10 days, it is calling for southerly winds all the way through. The plus side of that is the water should warm up! Looks like another stretch of no surfing for puttzle. We know that the Mayor will also not surf as the next two weeks he is attempting to join the Seniors Tour. We wish him well.

No additional pictures or speeders, sorry I know how you all look forward to that.

See, I'm not fibbing.


Monday, April 18, 2005

A Tidbit

Babysitting Outsource. Funny.

An arboreal nocturnal lemur, Daubentonia madagascariensis, a native to Madagascar, has been discovered in the bamboo at San Onofre. It is the largest nocturnal primate in the world and one of the strangest mammals on the planet, so it should fit in well at San Onofre. Park Rangers are befuddled as to how it got there.

Surfer Fights Off Shark, Keeps Surfing

SAN ONOFRE, Ca. - A surfer at San Onofre fought off a seventeen-foot shark with his board — and kept on surfing, a ranger said. Bruce Savage returned to Old Mans Beach 30 minutes after surviving the attack, despite the beach being closed because of the danger, ranger Hal Dairywimple said. "He was pretty calm about it, very laid back," said Dairywimple, who was on the beach when the 70-year-old surfer rode his damaged board back in after the attack.

Savage was sitting on his board about 100 feet offshore when the shark attacked. He told a newspaper that he rammed the board, a recent 70th birthday present from his girlfriend Sabrina Wentworth, into the shark's mouth. He said it was a Talega Surf & Sport Sano model . "I shoved the board at it like a barge pole," the Daily Sun post quoted him as saying. He said the shark released the board and he quickly headed for shore. "It was only about 10 or 15 seconds that I was waiting for a wave but it seemed like an eternity," he told the newspaper. "You think you'd go to jelly when something like this happens but I was surprisingly calm." The shark took two bites of the fiberglass board before stopping the attack, Dairywimple told The Associated Press by telephone.

"There were two big puncture mark bites on the board, but it didn't actually bite a hunk out of it so he was able to ride it in,"Dairywimple said He came back 30 minutes later to surf with a replacement board, Dairywimple said. Last month, a 20-foot Killer Whale tore a man in half and ate 3 black labs as he and the slobbering dogs floundered off the point.

Puttzle's Corner

What a perfect day for San-O to be closed, hopefully tomorrow brings more of the same. As soon as I walked outside this morning, I was greeted with a SSW wind. That made it easy for me, I just turned around and walked back into the abode. As a result, I have no idea what it looks like as it is still dark out. I know you'll all be really disappointed in this, but there will be no pictures today on any of the blogs. Fret not my friends, after the new road work is completed, I know the speeder's blog is going to be busy. That nice smooth asphalt will look like the California Speedway for some. The only things planned to slow drivers down on the stretch of road are signs and a series of speedbumps starting at the the Hawaiian Club rancho and ending at the Old Man's shack. Plans call for painting the bumps to match the benches, at least in the HC area.

I was just looking at the 10 day weather and right now it says that come Friday we are in for 5 or 6 days of showers, so there is still a chance for a new 'since recorded time' rainfall record. Something to shoot for.

I spoke to the Olympic Gold Medal Winner this morning. It sure was nice to hear his voice. Please continue to keep that fiesty sucker in your thoughts and prayers. Get better TM, we need you back out in the water!

For your entertainment, check out this story, this story and this story.

Sunday, April 17, 2005

Sunday Service

Wow, another fabulous morning in the surf. Size and conditions much the same as yesterday, maybe a bit more walled up. Once again, my first few waves were fun as heck. Eye Guy, Joe in his Wetsuit, Russ, Hor-hay, Kenny, BD, Panaman and Grumpy (sorry if I forgot anyone) were also taking advantage of the situation. After catching rights all morning, I snagged myself a very nice left that made my day. I even pulled off a big roundhouse. Life is good!

As with yesterday, it is crowded with people who have no business going out at the Point. When it's a nice 3-5 feet (at least), the dang Point gets pretty darn good. Bummer is that all the Talegalites do is get in the way! Hopping, standing up no hands, falling off before they even get up, the usual kookage. I said it before and I'll say it again, these people need to start at Dogpatch and work their way up...over many years. Better yet, take up golfing.

Now don't forget, and this is the truth, SAN ONOFRE SURFING BEACH WILL BE CLOSED, Monday and Tuesday for major road construction. Anyone who wants to surf will have to park in the Edison lot up top by the kiosk and either walk down the cliff or the road.

More pictures and of course, SPEEDERS!


The cross-stepping Richard Cheeeewww.


Part 1 of the Panaman-Ben debacle.

Part 2.

Saturday, April 16, 2005

Saturday In Puttzle's Corner

Once again, I jumped right out of the vehicle, suited up and hit the surf and boy was it fun! I was so amped and stoked after my first 3 waves that I could not contain myself!!! I have a hard time thinking I was the only one. BD also was beaming, Grumpy was happy (?), even SANOMAN (nice name) and Professor Ralph hopped out early. The water was about 2 or 3 degrees warmer according to my handy thermometer strip. Nice surf, mainly from the westsouthwest, occasionally a westnorthwest one would roll through. Excellent offshore conditions and a very favorable tide. Looks to me like it is holding size a lot better today than it did yesterday, still some nice sets although the tide is dropping fast.

Before you jump in the jalopy and head for good old San-O, let me tell you about the crowd. Oh yeah, every Talegalite with a pass or $10.00 was there. (NOTE: if anybody takes offense to our use of the term "Talegalite", which we have trademarked and will be seeking recourse if anyone uses it without our permission, rest assured that we only use it in the fondest of terms). Spread all over the place, insuring hoppage to the max. If you could catch a nice one, it is excellent. Therein lies the rub, almost no way was that possible as the morning progressed. Don't believe me, then check the picture place.

Don't forget the speeders!

Mini Mayor.

A lot of these went unridden.

Stay close to the...


Bird perch.

Friday, April 15, 2005

By Popular Demand

Ok, here's what I've done. I've created yet another blog, this one called San-O Speeders. Starting tomorrow, I will not be putting the speeding vehicles on puttzle's pics, the new blog is for them. Meaning those of you who do not care for that feature can easily bypass it.

Standing In Puttzle's Corner

Finally, I surfed! No hesitation, suited up and hit the water, second guy out. It makes me chuckle. All these guys come racing in, already suited up, and I still beat them into the water. I have to put on my suit, booties (always!) and today gloves, as well as put my center fin in my board. I expected frigid water and was pleasantly surprised. I definitely could have forgone the gloves. Because I didn't have my glasses on, I couldn't read my slick new thermometer strip, but I would say around 56 or 57. Surf was the best I've seen for a few weeks, a little size at the start, 2-4 with bigger sets. Unfortunately as is often the case, the dropping tide absolutely killed it. By far best at the start. By the time I left after 9:00, the sets were virtually non-existent.

I have to mention something that I did this morning that I am not really that proud of. I fully hopped and then stuffed someone. On purpose. There's this guy who has been surfing the Zanzabar and nearby area for about a year now. He has repeatedly hopped me and totally screwed up my ride. I'll be on the peak, nice left, streaking down the line and he will hop me in the most critical part. Repeatedly...and it's not only me that he does that to so don't think it's some grudge against me. Grumpy, I'm sure you know who I am referring to. I've exchanged "pleasantries" with him more than once. He hasn't "learned" yet. Today, I grabbed a wave, jammed right only to find him in the process of dropping in on me. I came off the bottom right at him and he got out, but his damn board almost knocked me in the head! That's it! I paddled over to the Bar and waited. Here comes a left, I'm waayyyy down on the shoulder. He takes off. I wait. I hop. I stuff. I rejoice. After further thought, I suck! What I did is something that totally pisses me off when I am the receivee. I feel dirty.

As you should know, there are speeders and other surf pictures from today on the picture blog. Oh, and Jason, I was not taking your picture, I was trying to catch the fool speeding the other direction...and I got him.

It's Hor-hay of course.



I think it's John V. (We need a nickname for you, Mr. V.)

Mayor Gets A Steaming Pile O' Crap In The Mail

News Edition: 03/17/2005 SAN ONOFRE - A harassment complaint has been filed with park rangers after mini mayor found fecal matter in an envelope addressed San Onofre mayor Murphy.

The envelope was one of two that contained harassing materials, according to a report filed Friday with park rangers. The envelopes also contained aletter from someone complaining about the beach's ban on smoking in enclosed public places. Park rangers declined to comment about the contents of the letter, but Lt. Hal Dairywimple said officers are investigating. Dairywimple said rangers think both envelopes were sent by the same person.

The harassing letter - which had no return address - was discovered Friday
by mini mayor, an aide who opens all of Murphy's mail. San Onofre officials routinely receive phone calls, letters, e-mails and faxes from beachgoers upset about an issue or the way someone voted, but this communication crossed the line, Murphy said. "An angry letter is not that big a surprise," he said. "This was just a very, very sick person."

Thursday, April 14, 2005

San Onofre to Host World Toilet Summit

Thu Apr 14, 8:47 AM ET Strange News - AP

SAN ONOFRE - The state parks plan to upgrade hygiene in its public toilets to meet international standards as it prepares to host the World Toilet Summit next year, a park official said Wednesday.

"Toilets are very important for the beach's image in the eyes of visitors," said Ralph Chareonsak, a senior official of the State Parks Public Health Ministry.

The conference is to be held at surf beach in May 2006.

The first summit, organized by the World Toilet Organization, was held in 2001 at Doheny, where toilet facilities are often in need of upgrades. Topics discussed at the meetings include toilet design and technology, toilet management and hygiene and energy-saving measures.

Sitting In Puttzle's Corner

Ya know what, I'm a fool, which I am sure comes as no surprise. The surf was small at the start, but soon was rising, even with the outgoing tide. Still a bit ugly, sections and a bit of unsteadiness on the surface. There were definitely some decent waves, but still not enough for me. I should have gone out, but I was content to snap pictures and stay warm. If things improve in the morning, I may have to force myself to go out. I need the exercise if nothing else. However, unless the direction shifts either a bit north or south, it looks like it could be a lot of 'wallers' tomorrow.

As a service for tax filers, the IRS has contracted with the State Parks to accept 2004 tax filings tomorrow at the kiosk. They will be stamped with San Onofre, mailed and processed. That way you can eliminate the trip to the post office to mail it off and come straight to the beach. You can drop it off anytime during park hours which are 7:00 a.m. to 8:00 p.m.

Because I am out of work and have nothing better to do, I have posted additionl pictures on puttzle's pics.


Moon Phase