Tuesday, May 23, 2006


Spray paint sales were down 8%
Spray paint theft was down 97%
Shoplifting was down 83%
Murders were down 79%
Auto theft was down 88%
Jail cells were empty in many cities leading to extra days off for the policemen.
Prisons were running at only 40% capacity and thousands of prison guards were laid off across the country.
There were no reports of any muggings on buses or subways.
There were no reports of any traffic accidents where drivers got out of stolen cars and tried to run away.
Many stores that sold chrome wheels for cars had to close because of slow sales.
People were able to come and go at Home Depots across the country without several illegal aliens crowding around their cars.
City workers that paint over graffiti in several major cities were asked to take the day off because of no work to do.
With no vandalism at city parks, workers had time to plant new trees and flowers for the first time in many years.
Hospital emergency rooms were available once again for paying legal citizens.
Teachers in several schools across the country were able to get more done teaching in English only.

1 comment:

El Chicano said...

Why do mexicans use such small steering wheels on their cars?

Because it makes it easier to drive with handcuffs on!

Moon Phase