Dutch Midget Performs

Boss, I'm saving a lot of time by not securing the lids when nothing is going to happen during transport anyway.

Weather Alert

Click here for hurricane info.

AND THE WINNER IS

In the old days, if something broke down and needed to be repaired.
You would either Jury Rig, Mickey Mouse, or in more resent times MacGyver it back together.
The first and the third fix was always easily understood, but to Mickey Mouse something?
Having said that.

If McCain is elected our next leader, we will have a Mickey Mouse answer to the problems of our nation.

If Obama is elected, it would be a JURY-RIG solution to our mess.

Until MacGyver runs for the highest office, lets leave him out of this.

You Can Learn So Much About A Person When They Open Their Mouth

Take this woman for instance. She is not unattractive. She looks normal. Somehow she chose to sunbathe right in the middle of the volleyball courts.

I was there when a couple of guys asked her politely if she could move because she was sitting in the middle of the courts and they wanted to play volleyball. She started fulminating about how she was there first and it's a public beach and she was using the volleyball court in her "own way" and that she has the same rights as everybody else. Before anyone could respond, her tirade became so vulgar that it would make a French Legionnaire blush. People were literally hurrying away from the scene. Mothers covered their children's ears as they carried them away. Someone called 911 and reported that there was a mentally deranged woman yelling at children, though I did not see her direct any of her attacks at children.

Forty-five minutes later she was still there, lying on her towel in the middle of the volleyball courts.

Fan No. 10,000,032 of Tubesteak’s Video Blog Tubesteak

COINCIDENCE????

Obama Biden
Osama Binladen

Don't Fall Asleep At San Onofre

On the trail of Bigfoot

The Shit Hits The Microwave

San Clemente. CA (API) -- Police in San Clemente are looking for three men who were involved in cooking human feces in a convenience store microwave oven.

Police say one of the men placed a one gallon plastic baggie with human feces inside of it inside the oven and set the timer for ten minutes.

They say it happened on August 21th at approximately 10:45 p.m. at the 7-11 in San Clemente.

The men left the area, and after the bag exploded, it ruined the microwave costing approximately $3,500.00 in damage. The store had to be aired out for a long period of time, causing lost profits.

SWEET DREAMS, SLEEPERS....

Not satisfied with Spin's Kazoo's, Murphy and Puttzle rehearse their own rendition of Count Basie's "One O'clock Jump" at the ninth hole of the Shorecliffs Golf Course. Ready or not, they will be performing for the line sleepers at 4am this Saturday.

San-O Beach Tip No. 89: Bocce Rules

Yes, you've got it right. It's 3 points for a hit and 1 point for closest, but right now I just want you to point to the ball closest to the pallino because we have 4 more to throw.

Complete San Onofre Bocce Rules in comments section.

Star Gazers Surf Band Practice Announcement

Musical instruments have been purhased. Our first formal band practice shall be Saturday, August 23rd at 0400 of course. Hopefully some of our friendly RVers with get there nice and early, say about 0200, to hear us practice. It sure would be a shame if we woke them up.

Dog Days Of San Onofre - 002

Wants To Run Fro SOSC BOD President

The man has excellent credentials and surfs the Point regularly. He would be a real asset to San Onofre.

Vote For Beaver Cleaver for SOSC BOD PRESIDENT.

Fan No. 10,000,029 of Tubesteak’s Video Blog Tubesteak

In Your Face Anonymous

Go ahead, I dare you.

Drooling, Yelping Puppy Need Good Home

Some A-Hole was kicking this 10 week old Blue Nosed Pit Bull Puppy today, so of course I bought it off him. She is a real cutie pie but I cannot have her as I already have the 150 lb. Murph. Let me know if you know of a good family looking for a cute puppy. Free to good people. See Spin, Dingo, Puttzle, Archie or Murphy for my contact info. Sorry to put this on our surfing blog but need to find her a home quick.

Solution To The Bathroom Shortage At San Onofre

Still Not My Pick

Sen. Obama took some much needed time off today,
from the riggers of his current bid to become
the next President of the United States.
While body slamming a few waves at Sano,
he made it a point to reassure everyone on hand at the time that the 241 extension would be delayed indefinitely.
He was also quick to put to rest any ideas the Navy Department has about using the water inlet just to the north as a hover craft training area.

A Thought On The Changes At San Onofre

First they came for the drinkers,
And I didn't speak up because I wasn't a drinker;





And then they came for the nudists,
And I didn't speak up because I wasn't a nudist;








And then they came for the dog owners,
And I didn't speak up because I didn't own a dog;












And then they came for me,
And by that time there was no one left to speak up.

THE NEW UNIFORM OF THE 4-AM DAWN PATROL...

The Daily celebratory parade starts at the gate every morning at 4am. The parade route is repeated to the end of the line and back until the gate opens. Special weekend summer editions of the parade begin at 3am through Labor day.

New Signs At San-O Kiosk Line

Due to several complaints from the early morning RV crowd, new signs will be going up today all along the entrance to the kiosk. Evidently, some RVer's have complained of excessive, deliberate shouting, provoked dog barking & howling, fowl language and loud whistling in the early morning hours before San Onofre opens. A rather huge man was seen acosting and elderly woman early Sunday morning. He was seen holding something large in his hand while shouting, "why don't you stuff this in your mouth you old bag?". Numberous noise complaints have recently been filed by several RVer's who like to arrive at San Onofre near midnight, then sleep in their RV's until the kiosk opens. Some have even reported fights breaking out between the locals and RVer's. The new new noise abatement policy will take effect on Friday, August 22nd.

THE SHADOW KNOWS....

Identify and win!

TRAGEDY AT SAN ONOFRE....

Yowza!

Woman Spotted Yesterday Reading Today's Newspaper

Some Kook In The Way At The Point

San-O Pair Indicted In Payoff Scheme

Archie Rice and Spin Evans were idicted today for illegal payoffs to secure construction contracts. It was reported that large amounts of cash and even gifts of new surfboards were were used to garner multiple contract awards. The pair was realeased on O.R. pending their next court appearance. This is not the first time these two contractors have been in hot water according to the District Attorney's office.

Fan No. 10,000,031 of Tubesteak’s Video Blog Tubesteak

The Dusty Road

If you are going to sit on the logs and chat with your friends at San Onofre, you will pick up a little road dust from passing vehicles.

TWO GIRLS, ONE CUP....

AT A VIDEO STORE NEAR YOU....

The Movie That Came With My New iPhone

Still Making It Happen

While on my escape to Bolivia, I stopped by La Saladita near Zihuatanejo for a week. In the water every single morning for 2-3 hours was Corky, still gettin it done with class and joy. He was joking with everyone in the water and kept everything very upbeat. This guy can still surf with the best of them. He is a true ambassador to the sport and lifestyle. He even gave me a wave, saying "go ahead, there's plenty here for everyone".

Fan No. 10,000,030 of Tubesteak’s Video Blog Tubesteak

Washing Mrs. Slocombe's Pussy

In the long running sitcom Are You Being Served?, Mrs. Slocombe is often heard to be concerned with the welfare of her pussy. This double entendre was also used with some other cast members of the show, showing their unawareness, with lines such as "I hope this meeting won't take very long, it's very unfair on Mrs. Slocombe's pussy". In the episode "Calling All Customers", Mrs. Slocombe calls a lonely trucker on Mr. Humphries’ CB radio. The trucker tells her he’s hauling dynamite, and proceeds to ask her about her interests. She notes gardening, but that her pussy is her favorite hobby. She exclaims that she has a mantle full of trophies and that it wins a medal every time she shows it. Then follows the sound of screeching tires and an explosion. Mr. Humphries laments that the trucker has "pulled off for a coffee".

News Of My Demise Is Premature

Due to ongoing IRS issues and inevitable prison time, I have decided to relocate to sunny Bolivia. I cashed in my I.G.G. Fund (ill gotten gains) and headed for sunny Zihuatanejo for some waves and fun at La Saladita then off to Bolivia. Before leaving, I filled my kayak with my gear along with about 50 lbs of bloody meat, shoved it out to sea, thus the bogus shark attack. Sorry if I worried you all but the Spin is safe and sound and loving life. I will contact you all again when able.

Man Seeks Woman

Persons of Interest in Tubesteak Disappearance

Citizens concerned about Tubesteak's disappearance have gotten together with the San Clemente Police Department. Based upon descriptions provided by members of the San-O Daze blog, sketches of several persons who were in the general vicinity of Tubesteak near the time he was last seen have been prepared by top police sketch artists.

Local authorities are now asking for the public's help. If you have seen any of these people, please, we implore you, post all information you can here and we will route it to the proper authorities.

MAYOR ATTEMPTS TO PROVE TO TUBESTEAK THAT THERE IS A POINT...

Surfing Calendar 2008

I ordered this calendar without seeing it. The description said that it was a "Surf's Up Boardriding Calendar." I suppose that is true, as far as it goes, but every month turned out to be a nude guy, or sometimes 2 or 3. Here's the mildest pose.

Did I miss some obvious "code words" in the description of the calendar or something? I ask because I am not the market to which this calendar is so clearly targeted. I mean, I remember when "gay" meant carefree, really happy, or joyful; and now it is a synonym for homosexuality. Did the meaning of "Surf's Up" or "Boardriding" change when I wasn't paying attention?

MAGGOT-MAN FOUND BEHIND 4-DOORS...

Alerted by a foul smelling odor, Park Rangers found this vagabond sleeping in the bushes behind 4-Doors.

Her Brand Spanking New Tattoo

Tubesteak Tribute No. 500,008 - Dogs 2.0

HE MADE THE COVER.....

And being the modest man that he is, never told us.

Fan No. 10,000,026 of Tubesteak’s Video Blog Tubesteak

My Least Favorite Surf Shop

They used to sell surfboards, old LPs, and books. New management took over and they switched almost exclusively to books. It never had the same comfortable feel after the change. But maybe it was me . . . I didn't want to have a comfortable feel.

It's A Tough Real Estate Market

Ya gotta do what ya gotta do.

SAN-O DAZE HELPFUL HINTS....

Fan No. 10,000,018 of Tubesteak’s Video Blog Tubesteak