Butt Patrol

San Onofre State Park, has had enough of careless smokers who dispose of their butts on the beach.

Coinciding with World No Tobacco Day Wednesday, a team of 30 plain-clothed rangers were prowling San Onofre surfing beach as part of an anti-smoking and litter crackdown.

Nicknamed by local media as "Butt Busters" and the "Butt Force," the rangers have been issuing fines of $45 for smokers who dump their butts on the beach instead of in designated bins.

The fine jumps to $200 for smokers who dump lit cigarettes.

Sheriff Bob, chief of the" Butt Buster" squad, said 45 smokers had been fined in the past week for indiscriminate cigarette littering.

He said more than 5,000 butts were discarded daily on the beach in 2005, many of which find their way into the lineup with the surfers.

"The new hardline approach, which we do not apologize for, is designed to reduce thousands of cigarette butts that are littered across the beach every day to the detriment of our wonderful waterways,"Sheriff Bob said in a statement.

Officials estimate that about one million butts were discarded inappropriately at San Onofre in 2005.

Some of those caught in the act were taking the fines on the chin, local media said.

"It's a dirty, rotten habit and I should've put it in the bin," the Sun Post newspaper quoted one unidentified puffer as saying.

May the Butt Force be with you.

We all must look at this. Dr's orders. (see article below)

I'M SURE DR. RALPH HAD SOMETHING TO DO WITH THIS!

Conception

In all likely hood, this is how anonymous people are conceived.

Could this be the real "Brownhole" mobile?

Travel

I have been a lot of places around this world. But I am really looking forward to my next trip!
The tip of South Africa.

Communique From The blog monitor

San-O Daze is closed today in observance of Memorial Day. Come back tomorrow.

The return of Dr. Ralph

I fell asleep the other night, watching an old South Park episode. The one where Kenny gets killed by the Russian space station ,that crashes to earth and smashes him.
Apparently this triggered a dream. In my dream ,I was walking along the beach. I stumbled on,what turned out to be a lamp. I figured it washed up from the ocean. I thought it might be a magic lamp, so I rubbed it and made three wishes.
The next thing I know! There are beautiful women everywhere , I have piles of money, and a very soar neck.

What causes dreams, anyway?

Many different theories, nothing for sure. According to the Freudian school, dreams are the result of subconscious thoughts and desires. The other extreme attributes dreams to random "noise" in the neurons without special meaning.
My understanding is that dreams are made out of many small parts of memory and imagination that get combined to form dream imagery. This is a process that runs both consciously and subconsciously. I don't know and leave to speculation the reason why this is so.

Well, okay!

Drralph the "shark whisperer" in his glory days. Ironically, he would meet his demise from a couple of blond haired genies.

In this photo provided by Marine Institute. Dingo,( interning for the recently deceased Dr. Ralph), director of the Marine Institute Laboratory center for shark research in Dana Point Ca., examines a great hammer head shark that was caught near Dana Point Ca. Tuesday, May 23. 2006. Mayor Murphy, of San Clemente Ca. , landed the hammer head Tuesday, after fighting it for nearly six hours. The shark measured 14 feet, 6 inches, and preliminary weighed in at 1,280 pounds.(AP Photo/.Dana Point Marine Institute)

Drralph is walking along a beach at The Point when he comes across a lamp partially buried in the sand. He picks up the lamp and gives it a rub. Two blonde genies appear, and they tell him he has been granted three wishes. Drralph makes his three wishes and the blonde genies disappear. The next thing Drralph knows, he's in a bedroom, in a mansion surrounded by 50 beautiful women He makes love to all of them and begins to explore the house. Suddenly he feels something soft under his feet, he looks down and the floor is covered in $1,000 bills. Then, there's a knock at the door. He answers it and standing there are two persons dressed in Ku Klux Klan outfits. They drag him outside to the nearest tree, throw a rope over a limb and hang him by the neck until he's dead. As the Klansmen are walking away, they remove their hoods; it's the two blonde genies. One blonde genie says to the other one," I can understand the first wish having all these beautiful women in a big mansion to make love to I can also understand him wanting to be a millionaire, but why he wanted to be hung like a black man is beyond me.

Morning surf check.

LIST OF SENATORS WHO REPRESENT MEXICO

YEAs ---62 Akaka (D-HI) Baucus (D-MT) Bayh (D-IN) Bennett (R-UT) Biden (D-DE) Bingaman (D-NM) Boxer (D-CA) Brownback (R-KS) Cantwell (D-WA) Carper (D-DE) Chafee (R-RI) Clinton (D-NY) Coleman (R-MN) Collins (R-ME) Conrad (D-ND) Craig (R-ID) Dayton (D-MN) DeWine (R-OH) Dodd (D-CT) Domenici (R-NM) Durbin (D-IL) Feingold (D-WI) Feinstein (D-CA) Frist (R-TN) Graham (R-SC) Gregg (R-NH) Hagel (R-NE) Harkin (D-IA) Inouye (D-HI) Jeffords (I-VT) Johnson (D-SD) Kennedy (D-MA) Kerry (D-MA) Kohl (D-WI) Landrieu (D-LA) Lautenberg (D-NJ) Leahy (D-VT) Levin (D-MI) Lieberman (D-CT) Lincoln (D-AR) Lugar (R-IN) Martinez (R-FL) McCain (R-AZ) McConnell (R-KY) Menendez (D-NJ) Mikulski (D-MD) Murkowski (R-AK) Murray (D-WA) Nelson (D-FL) Obama (D-IL) Pryor (D-AR) Reed (D-RI) Reid (D-NV) Sarbanes (D-MD) Schumer (D-NY) Smith (R-OR) Snowe (R-ME) Specter (R-PA) Stevens (R-AK) Voinovich (R-OH) Warner (R-VA) Wyden (D-OR)

COURAGEOUS SENATORS WHO STOOD UP AGAINST POWERFUL FORCES AND VOTED AGAINST THE S. 2611 AMNESTY. HERE ARE 4 DEMOCRATS WHO BUCKED THEIR ENTIRE PARTY LEADERSHIP. AND THE 32 REPUBLICANS WHO TURNED THEIR BACKS ON A FULL-COURT-PRESS APPEAL FROM THE PRESIDENT OF THEIR OWN PARTY AND FROM THE U.S. CHAMBER OF COMMERCE BACKBONE OF THEIR PARTY. NAYs ---36 Alexander (R-TN) Allard (R-CO) Allen (R-VA) Bond (R-MO) Bunning (R-KY) Burns (R-MT) Burr (R-NC) Byrd (D-WV) Chambliss (R-GA) Coburn (R-OK) Cochran (R-MS) Cornyn (R-TX) Crapo (R-ID) DeMint (R-SC) Dole (R-NC) Dorgan (D-ND) Ensign (R-NV) Enzi (R-WY) Grassley (R-IA) Hatch (R-UT) Hutchison (R-TX) Inhofe (R-OK) Isakson (R-GA) Kyl (R-AZ) Lott (R-MS) Nelson (D-NE) Roberts (R-KS) Santorum (R-PA) Sessions (R-AL) Shelby (R-AL) Stabenow (D-MI) Sununu (R-NH) Talent (R-MO) Thomas (R-WY) Thune (R-SD) Vitter (R-LA) Not Voting - 2 Rockefeller (D-WV) -- recovering from back surgery Salazar (D-CO)

Two Arabs boarded a flight out of London. One took a window seat and the other sat next to him in the middle seat. Just before takeoff, Drralph, returning from a conference, sat down in the aisle seat.
After takeoff, Drralph kicked his shoes off, wiggled his toes and was settling in when the Arab in the window seat said, "I need to get up and get a coke." "Don't get up," said Drralph, "I'm in the aisle seat, I'll get it for you."
As soon as he left, one of the Arabs picked up Drralph's shoe and spat in it. When Drralph returned with the coke, the other Arab said, "That looks good, I'd really like one, too." Again, the ever accomidating Drralph obligingly went to fetch it.
While he was gone the other Arab picked up Drralph's other shoe and spat in it. When Drralph returned, they all sat back and enjoyed the flight. As the plane was landing, Drralph slipped his feet into his shoes and knew immediately what had happened.
"Why does it have to be this way?" he asked. "How long must this go on? This fighting between our nations? This hatred? This animosity? This spitting in shoes and pissing in cokes?"

DEADLY SPIDERS INVADE SAN ONOFRE

Last week this poor guy was eating his lunch in the shade of the bamboo at Oldmans. Having just bit into his pastrami on rye, a spider drops out of the bamboo and lands on his thumb. As he goes to brush it off, it bites him. At first he thinks nothing of it. Then the deadly progression of the poison takes effect as can be seen in the photos. The hand was later amputated. Parents! KEEP YOUR KIDS OUT OF THE BAMBOO!

A surfer, on his way home from San Onofre, came to a dead halt in traffic and thought to himself, "Wow, this seems much worse than usual". He notices a police officer walking between the lines of stopped cars, so he rolls down his window and asks, "Officer, what's the hold up?" The officer replies, "Vicente Fox is depressed, so he stopped his motorcade and is threatening to douse himself in gasoline and set himself on fire. He says hes upset about the US threatening to strengthen its borders and crack down on illegals. So we're taking up a collection for him". The surfer asks, "How much have you got so far?" The officer replies "About 40 gallons, but a lot of folks are still siphoning."

Its so nice to have blue skies again!

Brain scan

This is addressed to the blog monkey specifically. The above scan is that of an abnormal brain. The scan above that is of an, essentially normal brain. Yours is the one highlighted in shades of blue. You are beyond help.

Barbaro, feeling much better today.Waxed up his board, and got some fun little waves at Old Mans.

Now he's gone too far!

The "Blog Monitor" monitoring the Dogpatch area.

The San Diego freeway today!

The San Diego freeway before the illegals arrived!

MEET "THE BLOG MONITOR"

He sees all at San Onofre.

MORE RESULTS FROM THE "DAY WITHOUT ILLEGALS"

Spray paint sales were down 8%
Spray paint theft was down 97%
Shoplifting was down 83%
Murders were down 79%
Auto theft was down 88%
Jail cells were empty in many cities leading to extra days off for the policemen.
Prisons were running at only 40% capacity and thousands of prison guards were laid off across the country.
There were no reports of any muggings on buses or subways.
There were no reports of any traffic accidents where drivers got out of stolen cars and tried to run away.
Many stores that sold chrome wheels for cars had to close because of slow sales.
People were able to come and go at Home Depots across the country without several illegal aliens crowding around their cars.
City workers that paint over graffiti in several major cities were asked to take the day off because of no work to do.
With no vandalism at city parks, workers had time to plant new trees and flowers for the first time in many years.
Hospital emergency rooms were available once again for paying legal citizens.
Teachers in several schools across the country were able to get more done teaching in English only.

The solution to the illegal alien problem. Click here! Any resemblance to Tubesteak is purely coincidental.

Remember, its "ride your bike to work week".

Dr. Dolittle and his daily surf check.

Blog

What is a blog? Perhaps a journal of sorts! Daily comments of various accounts by whoever, about whatever.
Maybe it is like a dart board. Everyone has a handful of darts. Some are ground with the precision of a surgical tool. Others are ground with sand paper. While yet some are ground by scrapping them on the concrete to obtain a point. Still others have a rubber tip. Never the less there is a point.
So a precision ground dart is thrown at the board, but from a misguided hand. So it strikes somewhere around the outer edge of the board.
Here comes another dart, ground with sandpaper. How ever it is thrown with a bit more precision, so it strikes closer to the center of the board.
Here comes yet another dart, the one that was ground to a point on concrete. It was thrown by a very accurate hand and it strikes the center of the board.
Here comes another dart, you know the one with the rubber tip. It is thrown with the highest degree of accuracy, so it too strikes the center of the board. But it lacks ridgidness, so it falls aimlessly to the ground.
Now, you ask what the heck is the point of all this? Quite simply, keep gathering up your darts and letting them fly. You might even let the entire handful go once in awhile. One of them might even hit the center of the board.
Never the less, it is all in good or healthy fun.

The State put up some new signs at trail 6.

Good Morning! Did anything happen here over the weekend while I was gone?

Communique from The blog monitor

What? Click here.

You dropped a bomb on me!

Once again I see our illustrious friend The Blog Monitor is at it! Has anyone noticed the title of the blog? Insane-O Daze? It seems this guy could possibly make us or break us. Maybe Puttzle, Dingo, Drralph and myself should try and convince mister The Blog Monitor to join us if we can ever find him. Hell what I'm I talking about, he has joined us he has proven time and time again what he is capable of doing. The only question I have for him is: What the heck is this Lesson 1 2 & 3 crap all about. Come to think about it, its pissing me off again, his mind must be so twisted I don't think we could trust him to behave himself. So listen up mister THE BLOG MONITOR:

Lesson 1: Our internationally beloved unt Puttzle wiil find you.

Lesson 2: You can hack, but you can't hide.

Lesson 3: "I don't believe you want to get up and dance" The Gap Band

"MURPHY"

For a personal message from The blog monitor, click here.

From the office of The blog monitor

Lesson 1: I'm baaaaccckkkk.

Lesson 2: The blog monitor knows a lot more than people think.

Lesson 3: Keep your opinions to yourself.

Discussion is now encouraged.

Interesting thing it is. You google Dr. Ralph and do an image search and this guy pops up. The likeness is uncanny!

BOYCOTT RESULTS

On May 1st, as a result of the Mexican boycott, national retailers
reported 4.2% lower sales for the day, with a 67.8% reduction in
shoplifting.

The Brownhole mobile?

Hard at work

This is just another Sunday at Dingo' house.

It seems the enterprizing illegals are using push boats and charging their fellow countrymen for shuttle service from the swamp at Church, to the stagging area up San Mateo Creek.

When the President goes to Mexico to see his business partner El Presidente' Fox, he always takes his limo!

It's so nice to see the Oldmans wind indicator up and working again.

Fresh summer fruits are here and at a store near you!

The morning after another one of those wild drralph parties!

The only way to pick up a strong cell signal is to walk out on the beach. Reception by the bluffs is sketchy.

The sarape that traitorous Bush should have worn on his kiss-ass speech to his best friend Vicente and all of the illegals last night!

That is Fronkinsteen

Just thought you would like to know who my mentor was. I interned with him for two years, when he was suddenly summond to Transylvania.

This is also on display at the Surf Museum. I can think of a few married guys who at one time surfed that this may have belonged to.

Famous big wave rider dies and leaves his Testicles to the Surfing Heritage Foundation where they have been put on display. Laird Hamilton says he is going to do the same, and his friends were heard to say "ARE YOU NUTS"!

The cast of "BrokeBack Mountain 3" ( The big bad wolf eats the 3 little pigs) starring Momma Bare and the 3 Little pigs!

The Mothersday beer bash at Drralph's was a huge success!

And a Little something to wash down your snack!

A snack for the hungry times when you get out of the water.

Pool party at Q-balls house. Water temp 212 degrees. (If you don't know Q-ball, this may not make sense, sorry!)

Uh oh!

"You're traveling through another dimension, a dimension not only of sight and sound but of mind; a journey into a wondrous land whose boundaries are that of the imagination. Next stop:THE TWILIGHT ZONE."

Lesson 1: "You got to know when to hold 'em, know when to fold 'em" - Kenny Rogers

Lesson 2: Why yes, I am having fun!

Lesson 3: If you haven't figured it out by now, you never will.

Good-bye for now. We now return to regularly scheduled programming.

Today on the Blog Monitor's Blog

Lesson 1: Can you hear me now?

Lesson 2: Are we having fun yet?

Lesson 3: Order anchovies on the pizza.

Murphy,

Lesson 1: Know your opponent.

Lesson 2: Never fight a one-armed man.

Lesson 3: Hee-Hee, Ho-Ho.

Murphy is slowing down nowadays.

Now I'm pissed! As you can see, Dingo, Puttzle, DR. Ralph and especially YOU Murphy, I have the ability to take you down. Just try and delete this!

I caught this at low tide. I think it's some sort of Dogfish.

"THE BLOG MONITOR"

Drralph, can you help "the blog monitor"? He/she really has a problem, he/she has been spending way to much time monitoring and ignoring his/her personnal hygiene and appearance. This is a recent photo of "The Blog Moniotor".